After a long, tiring week, it can be tempting to talk only about logistics and problems. A survey of American adults suggests that couples who deliberately enjoy good moments together, such as retelling a happy memory, tend to report less conflict and more confidence in the relationship. It is an association from one person's answers, and no one has tested whether a habit like this changes anything.
The study, by Noah Larsen, Allen Barton and Brian Ogolsky at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, was published in 2025 in the journal Contemporary Family Therapy under the title Joint Savoring in Romantic Relationships: Correlates and Protective Effects. A university news release was reported by ScienceDaily in February 2026.
The researchers surveyed 589 adults across the United States online. Joint savouring was defined as couples intentionally appreciating positive shared experiences together. Participants answered questions about how much they did this, and about relationship satisfaction, conflict, confidence in the future of the relationship, feeling in control or overwhelmed, quality of life, general health and psychological distress.
Most participants were married (more than 85 per cent), about 10 per cent were engaged and 4 per cent were in committed dating relationships. The average age was about 39, slightly over half were women, and more than 85 per cent were white. Only one person from each couple took part. Partners were not surveyed.
On average, participants reported fairly high levels of savouring, both on their own and with their partner, and fairly low stress. People who said they savoured more together also reported less conflict, higher relationship satisfaction and more confidence in a future together.
The researchers also noted that the links looked stronger for people under higher stress, where joint savouring appeared to be associated with protecting confidence in the relationship and mental health. There were smaller links with personal health and wellbeing as well.
The news report did not give statistics, effect sizes or p-values, so it is not possible to say from that page how large any of these differences were.
This was a survey completed at one point in time, so it can show that two things go together but not that one causes the other. Couples who are getting along well may find it easier to enjoy memories together, rather than the savouring producing the good relationship. The study design does not support a causal reading.
Only one partner answered, so the results show a single person's view of the relationship. The sample was mostly married and white, with a lot of people reporting low stress. It may not describe couples who are younger, in different cultures, in same-sex relationships or in more distressed circumstances. Online surveys also tend to attract people who are willing to take part, and the report gave no details of how participants were recruited.
No intervention was tested. Nobody was asked to start a savouring routine and then followed to see what happened. So this research cannot say whether trying it would help you, and for some people, revisiting happy times during a painful period may feel hollow or even sad. If your relationship is in serious difficulty, a nice memory is not a substitute for dealing with the problems, and this general information does not apply to relationships that feel unsafe. In Australia, Lifeline is on 13 11 14, and in an emergency call 000.
It is also worth noting what savouring looked like in the study. It was described as intentional appreciation of positive shared experiences, which can be as ordinary as looking at old photos, retelling a funny story from a holiday, or pausing to enjoy a good meal together. Nothing in the report suggests it needs to be elaborate.
Source: Joint Savoring in Romantic Relationships: Correlates and Protective Effects DOI: 10.1007/s10591-025-09769-5
Illustration of recalling and appreciating a shared happy memory. AI-generated editorial illustration. This article summarises published research in our own words and is general information, not personal health advice.
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